Our Relational Approach to Behaviour Support

At Hadrian School, we have a relational approach to supporting children’s social and emotional development.  We purposely use the language of ‘relationship support’ as opposed to ‘behaviour management’.  We know that the development of positive relationships are of utmost importance in ensuring that your child feels safe, regulated, happy and ready to learn.  We use these positive relationships, together with play and creative activities, to give children repeated key experiences related to their stage of development.

Our relational approach to behaviour support is underpinned by our knowledge and understanding of The Thrive Approach.  This is an evidence-informed, developmental and trauma-sensitive approach to meeting the emotional and social needs of children.  Thrive is based on child development, neuroscience and attachment research and helps children to engage with life and learning.  At Hadrian School we understand that all children benefit from the Thrive approach regardless of their background and experiences – It is a whole-school approach.  We provide consistency, predictability and routine to build a sense of safety in the emotional and physical environment.

The Relate Rupture Repair Cycle:  At times, it is inevitable that there will be a misunderstanding or misattunement in a relationship (between a child and adult).  We call this a rupture.  When a rupture happens, it is likely that we will see the child’s behaviour change.  It is important that ruptures in the relationship are noticed so they can be repaired.  The ‘repair’ phase of the cycle involves correcting the misattunement of the rupture by trying to share understanding of intentions, feelings, thoughts and actions.  At Hadrian School we understand that it is the adult’s role to repair the relationship, not the child’s.  The repair not only rewires patterns of behaviour; it also establishes trust.  We look into the emotional need being communicated and use this as an opportunity to support the child’s emotional learning, the development of their self-awareness and the widening of their window of tolerance. We are clear about establishing consistent boundaries whilst at the same time showing that we understand and care about the feelings which sit behind a child’s behaviour.

To support the rhythm of this cycle we use ‘PACE’. PACE is the acronym used in Thrive to describe the optimal way for adults to be with children:

Playfulness: We are playful in our interactions with children.  Sensitive and appropriate playfulness helps the child feel safe and promotes positivity.

Acceptance: We are always accepting of thoughts and feelings without criticism.  We are accepting of the feelings that may trigger their behaviour (whilst having clear and consistent boundaries).

Curiosity: We demonstrate an active interest in the child’s experience.

Empathy: We demonstrate compassion for the child and their feelings to support the child’s sense of self-worth.

Further detail can be found in our Relationship Support Policy.